Our God Is For Us!
I ran inside our house seeking shelter from the bitter cold of that December day wondering if I would ever adjust to the frigid temperatures typical of Midwest winters. I had grown up in southeast Texas, where gloves, scarves, and coats were fashion statements, not necessities.
As I shut the door against the icy winds, I plopped down on my couch, not even bothering to remove the thick layers of winter clothing. The bleakness of the sky seemed to increase the weariness that had settled over my heart.
I had moved from San Antonio to St. Louis with our four young children so that our three daughters who are profoundly hearing-impaired could undergo surgeries to receive cochlear implants and attend a special school which would provide the therapy necessary for them to learn to speak. My husband, Lee, an Air Force fighter pilot, hadn’t been able to move with us. He was stationed five hours away and for the next year would only be able to see us on the weekends.
Life was overwhelming to say the least. Between therapies, surgeries, medical appointments, audiologists, and speech homework, I was barely able to manage my family life. As much as I hate to admit it, Burger King became my most popular dinner choice.
Four young children, active and loud, requiring a great deal of care, and yet none of them could understand each other. When other children were learning to “use their words”, mine were developing their own love language of “using their hands” … grabbing and pushing.
As I sat on my couch that dreary day in December, I poured out my heart to God. “I’m lonely and overwhelmed. I know You led us here, but the girls’ progress is slow, almost imperceptible.” It seemed God wasn’t doing anything. The obstacles loomed large and impossible. I wondered how long our family would be separated. Our uncertain future filled my heart with fear.
At that moment, God reminded me of a question He’d taught me to ask when my circumstances and emotions threatened to overwhelm me: “What do I know that’s true?”
“Lord, I know that You are with me and for me in all Your power at all times. Your Word says: “If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all – how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things?” (Romans 8:31-32)
Thank You Lord that You are for me. You’ve given me Jesus, what more can I ask … and yet You are my Gracious Giver and it’s Your delight to pour out help, strength, and grace the moment I need it. Nothing is impossible for you. Nothing and no one can stand in the way of your very good plans being accomplished for our family. You will never leave us or forsake us. Thank you for leading us to St Louis where our girls could receive the help they need. Thank you that not one detail of our current situation has escaped your notice.”
Gratitude poured out in my prayer as I sensed the sustaining power of God’s Word washing away the weariness and filling my heart with faith and hope.
In spite of the Lord’s comfort through His Word and Presence, I remained keenly aware of a lingering sense of loneliness and simply wished I could talk to someone … but who could possibly understand what I was going through?
I prayed, “God, if You’ve got someone in mind, have them call me.” I was getting ready to leave the house to buy some comfort food when the phone rang.
The woman on the other end was the friend of a woman I’d met when we visited a local church. Surprisingly we had a lot in common: three of her four grown children were also deaf and they had moved to St Louis for the same reasons we had. Wow – someone who could understand!
This God-ordained conversation ministered to my heart in powerful ways but what brought the deepest impact were the reasons for her call that day.
“Kelly, for three days God has been whispering your name to me, telling me to call you, but I kept making excuses. ‘What will I say? How can I help?’ But today, God began yelling your name with such intensity that I could no longer ignore Him so I called.”
As I hung up the phone, I was overwhelmed, not with my circumstances, but by the extravagant love of a personal God whose heart is for me and who delights in displaying fresh expressions of His intimate love. I fell to my knees with tears streaming down my face. “I can’t believe you love me enough to arrange a phone call. And not only that, You knew how long it would take for her to say “yes” so You began doing it three days earlier!!"
This powerful revelation of God’s lavish love deepened my understanding of the heart of our God who “graciously gives us all things.”
May we abandon ourselves to the watchful care of our ever-present Lord and may we grasp in a fresh new way that The Lover of our souls is on the move for us and on our behalf. Nothing can separate us from His love, not hardship or trouble … The Champion of Heaven is for us!
The God who hung the stars in the sky and called them by name, knows your name. May we never get over the truth that the love of our immensely powerful God is also intensely personal!
